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Writer's pictureHaitian Barbie

Toxic Femininity šŸ¦„ On the Rise

Pick Me Culture : ā€œThĆ© Please choose me as an sexual gratification so I can fuel my self esteemā€œ . Has been out of control let alone the possible ability of it becoming all out dangerous now.

The anger and frustration I have for the toxic self esteem Fuelers in society now a days is destroying human interactions. Everything is base on a sexual or vanity stand point to determine oneā€™s worth or value. Relationship are not solely base on compatibility.

I often unfortunately see a lot of toxic culture on social media, mostly dating coaches or podcast host talking about how poor their human behaviors are and sharing it with the world as a guide to behave just as poorly or even worst. Day by day I seen more content on my social media feed about toxic culture.

I recently came across a few podcast reels in my Instagram. With both men & women, performing for one another. In the act of seeing who can fuel each otherā€™s self esteem through the validation of sexual value. One of the podcast had a women asking the question. ā€œ what makes a man choose a certain women while heā€™s drunk to have sex with after the clubā€ I wonder to myself, why would you want to be a women choose to be a manā€™s tool of masturbation after heā€™s drunk ? Why would you care if he choose another women instead of you ? You should be hoping none of those women submit to being his object of the night. The men went on to reponse to her question with the happiness of the validation of well i have the power to her self esteem now. So lets crush her self esteem and tell her some toxic trash. Heā€™s rĆ©ponse was ā€œ women with good pussy ā€œ whats women with good pussy ? I asked with sarcasm. To my understanding he replied. ā€œWhen itā€™s not wet or I have to work 15 - 48 mins to get it wetā€. Wow that means that yā€™all are not sexually compatible mostly liking due to to the fact that you are objectify her and sheā€™s is also objectify her self so her vagina machine didnā€™t work properly. Will you look at that. Maybe if they had a genuine connection they would be sexually compatible, due to the reason their compatible of genuine emotional human experiences. I donā€™t believe in bad pussy or bad dick. People bodies are different and I do believe physical Anatomy play a part in sexually experiences. So maybe when people arenā€™t enjoying each other their arenā€™t a match doesnā€™t mean they have non sexual desired body parts that canā€™t function to enjoying sexually relationship with a person.

I for experiences I want to feel safe, secure, comfortable not forced and as well not viewed as a sexual object. However a bond I am experiencing with a person whoā€™ I trust and trust me. Sex is an exchange of energy and a ton of other things. When sex is solely focused on the physical gratification of oneā€™s persons experiences it can play a role in why the intercourse wasnā€™t pleasurable.

In other terms of how People are auctioning them selves as solely sexual beings producing toxic femininity. You find that women willl threw women under the bus for the validation of a toxic man. No real healed or healthy man would feed the ego of a women looking and doing anything for the crumbs of attention. I have spoken about this before in previous blogs of mine about ā€œ flexed fly out cultureā€ and how itā€™s a from of sex delivered in some mens eyes. Again and again women are being fly out to man to spend time with him, she doesnā€™t have sex with him and men are capturing their anger on camera phones and sharing it to social media. People in the comment are giving their input in how women need to know that a men wants sex when they fly them out and they deserve this humiliation. Ofcourse women who want to gain the likability of men will agree that women have to share their bodies for sex, because they want to eliminate any from of consent in hopes it will rule those women out of having to be fly out. Then that way they will be the ones getting all the attention. Terrible that women would turn their backs on humanity for their ego and self esteem. Consent is essential for all women and men across everything that is. We have choices we deserve to make our own choices as humans.

Another form of popular toxic femininity is women completing with other women !! Whoā€™s a better women ? Whose a more visually appealing women ? This invisible competition has become very visible over the year into a huge egoistic self esteem game. That has no winners ! No women is the determination of another women worth of value as a human being with needs that differ from person to person. We are all our own people and have our own lives ! Some women believe in the idea that if they are fancier then other simple women. They think that those women are their bottom trash to hurl insults at ! Thatā€™s wrong ! Some women envy other women because she is fancier or does more aesthetics to her or is Society favored featured women. The envy needs to stop ! On both sides of those who want to be envied and those who envy ! Being envied is not a gift, to invalidate oneā€™s beauty & not being envied doesnā€™t mean that some oneā€™s worth is less. Self love plays a partial part in this. Mostly itā€™s about the ego, the sin of vanity. The monster that gets feed that never stops eating. One can not fuel their self esteem if they have this vanity monster being feed all the egotism. I think Iā€™ll write a blog about letting go of this monster that has took up livelihood in peoples lives in my next blog ! Steps to help defend slay that monster so self esteem can be build more healthy.


...........Toxic Feminity Goes On šŸ¤¢šŸ§Œ



As Self Esteem become a thing of the pass, sexual validation and ego boosters are the new Self Esteem ! Self respect seems to not matter any more if your gaining sexually validation or attention. Morals are being questioned and ignored. Morals are becoming more of a you donā€™t have to have them their just opinions. Not when your doing something wrong your welcoming dark energy or anything like that no not at all.

So as you know I am stalking social media for morals and a last bit of hope that people actually care about their souls and after life. To my disappointment I found yet again another women boosting and enjoying the gains of the attention of married men. So this is something that went viral both on tik tok and Twitter. So when it went on to Twitter it she had an excuse to why she was behaving the way she was. When in reality herwhole page is devoted to being a ā€œ man stealer ā€œ faults to the men who allow her to do it. In her expression, that itā€™s only the mens fault of her actions. When In reality, itā€™s both married men and her action that are at fault. She made a video that could anger married women. As a result most of her videos she says. ā€œ Has your wife called you handsome lately ? And bites her lips and looks at her phone and say ā€œ Your Handsomeā€ now married women reacted as they would calling her as she is a home wrecker. In knowledge she knew she wasnā€™t going to get positive feedback from her video. Her reaction to being called a home wrecker was to DM every ones husband. So it came around 4 husbands were DMā€™d. So 3 out of the 4 answers her and begun to flirt with her. One of the husband even manged to create a fake account and tell her she was beautiful and funny. Some how that husband got her number, because she was called on a no caller ID by the wife saying stay away from my family. The women arguing with her back and forth about calling her names and she saying well you were being mean to me so I decided to take your man. Nonsense really she was mean to her due to her obviously wanting to trigger women with her poor behavior. Trigger she did and in those triggers she got triggers in return. Called nasty name that she is, as I said before people are going to call jezebels what they are. If some chooses to be a Jezebel they shouldnt get mad about something they were so proud about doing. I also know that people wouldn't feel good to be called a hoe, home wrecker or Jezebel those are negative words that hold negative energy with them. So if those words donā€™t feel good to a person, why does the action feel good enough to be done? Because of the temporary high of the ego ? Then the downer of the reality of what has happen sets in and the search for another high is seeked. In her seeking that high she got a reality check of what she was actually doing and she try to reverse it into sheā€™s the viticm of bullying when sheā€™s actually the start of it. Why post in the beginning that your sleeping with peoples husbands and attracting married man. Got supported for being what you are a Jezebel. There nothing good that comes from a life style as that one. People arent going to make you feel good. Those married men arenā€™t caring that she feels good about her self. Their catering to her insecurityā€™s doesnā€™t mean the care for her they are doing so they can have access to her sexually. They know and see her for who she is ! They play along with her game to have their mission of being a poor husband and bad human being easier. Itā€™s very easy for people to cheat if the person they are cheating with knows their cheating. It takes the pressure of having to make up 2 sets of lies to different people. If one person is aboard with the lifestyle it makes it easy for them. Ofcourse she take pride in that because sheā€™s seeking some sort of important purpose and importance in some one life. So her being the women another womens husband is choosing and trusting to tell his apparent secrets and unspoken issues within the marriage with makes her feel good. Then her logic is " I did you a favor " to the wife " I let you know you deserve better". How can she be serious and say something like that when she subjects her self too low vibration men ? She really think sheā€™s doing theses married women a favor by exposing him while doing the dirty deed with him ? The lies sheā€™s tells her self to cover up the fact that sheā€™s doing something so deeply wrong is so loud! I have to ask why would you tell these women their man arenā€™t it and spend time with a man that isnā€™t it. That screams volumes of how she feels about her self ! She clearlying exhibiting very low self esteem ! She has the nerve to call other women insecure, but she is too. Women have this thing when they call another women insecure as the lowest point of a womenā€™s femininity. Itā€™s not true every one has theirs days and insecurityā€™s. The idea that a women, is to be looked at less valuable because she gets upset at other women who goes out their way to seduce her man to me is wrong. People are going to get upset if they feel threatened ! If women go online and say ā€œ at your boyfriends house ā€œ or ā€œ I called your husband handsome and DM him ā€œ. That will pull a reaction out of some one ! That doesnā€™t make them less of a women because they femine aura wasnā€™t what kept their man faithful. Yet women will say one thing and say your man should be faithful to you and I shouldnā€™t get his attention, yet in the same breathe go out her way to beg for every married manā€™s attention. After wards feel good that she got it and feel as if she did something to you because she now created a discomfort in your life and personally perpective of your self and relationship. So with all this being said I love for some one to make it make sense ! If itā€™s all about the man being faithful and he shouldnā€™t get your attention why are women alike as her seeking it so much? Well hereā€™s why because she beileve that her feminine aura and looks is something important to distract a man from his home or relationship. She says this " he really should be faithful", but doesnā€™t believe it. If she did she wouldnā€™t seek out married men. Which exposes the deeper root reason why she and women alike as her do what they do ! To fuel the empty canister of their femininity. Which will always remain, empty because their functioning on a contradiction and ego high.

A women sexually actions of convenience is not a feminine restoration of self esteem is actually destroys the self esteem with each action. To be a sexually convenience to a man is not something to boost or be proud about as a women. Being a women having the ability to enjoy sexual pleasure or give sexually pleasure is only a small aspect to being a women. Women are humans with goals, dreams, stories, ideas and hobbies that can be pursued. The idea that women are solely focus on their beauty being the winner of the face of what it is to be a women. Goes to show how much self esteem and and value they lack within their selves. How much they donā€™t know their selves and how much investment that needs to put into their self. The more we as women invest into our selves. Not just beauty & vanity wise, the more women will be more secure with who they are and understand their importance as a human being. Women should pick up hobbies that have nothing to do with their looks or the attraction of men or attention. That way they can focus on something meaningful and rewarding. Their feel better about their selves, itā€™s not going to be a fast builder to self love retention, however itā€™s a start to remove from the draining reminder that ā€œ your just great for sex or a other humans Instant gratificationā€.

Itā€™s important to understand that lifestyle of wanting to gratify a man sexual needs may end in a dark demise. I recently learned of 2 stories of women who become pregnant from men who were in relationship one was married and the other had a child with his gf. Both those women were murdered! One of the women who were unfortunately murdered by a married man at the time of the murder was having sex with her when he stabbed her. As for the another one they had sex and after he set the house she and her family lived in on fire to cover his dark actions. Both men wanted to conceal the cheating they committed to as well as wanted to remove the incoming child they created with those women. I share these dark stories as a cautionary tale about sex, cheating and this toxic culture. Those women did not deserve to die, as well as their unborn babies did not deserve to die. However we as humans have to learn the dark energy that comes along with the wrongs of cheating, as well as giving your self to men that will not care about you. Men's cheating led to dark unknowns, as for women being a women a man is cheating with is not a gift. He may hurt you to hide his actions. Vices verses that may happen to men as well they may get caught up in a fight and not come out the winner of living another day as well. The activity of sensesless sex Or sexually validation has dark consequences. Some of those consequences may be some ones self esteem hurt or relationship ruined or some ones called names, but some may not be unrecoverable action of death.

This poor behavior of cheating and being the side piece culture is on social media and in real life. Recently I was at a club booking a this women with his bf walked into the club and was enjoying their selves just as any one was in the club. Her boyfriend was looking at me, he keep looking at me and trying to get my attention. I ignored him, thought to my self, but why act as if your lady is not here and looking great Iā€™m sure not just for her, but for you as well. Later that night she left with out saying bye, then came back inside said bye to me. This isnā€™t the 1st time I have rejected men with their gfs or wives. Itā€™s about respect of self as well as others. I was at a Birthday dinner the table next to ours a couple were on a date. I stood up out my seat ready to leave with the rest of the group. The man on a date with his gf was staring and smiling at me ! She looked at him in his face as he done so, I walked away and waited near the door for the rest of the guest of the birthday dinner. There wasnt a reason in the world I needed to stand there while she was visibly mad about what happen. Even if a men comes on to a women and heā€™s responsible for their relationship it doesnā€™t mean that itā€™s okay to add issues and toxicity to the situation. The idea that I am sharing is that I couldā€™ve been more fuel to the fire, but I choose not to. So I caution women to stop seeking married men , bf, and baby daddies. As it doesnā€™t hurt you as a person to not act on dark energy. It doesnā€™t take away form you to be a decent person, but it does take away from you as a person being a bad one. Both parties in cheating should take accountability for their behavior.


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